Tell her she can't have a vagina
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
How does one acquire holy water?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
