If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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