dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
