So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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