so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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