Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize