people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize