hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
