I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
kristin has been a bad kristin
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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