More tranny stories later!
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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