I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Randomize
