doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
