I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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