I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
