Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
