you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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