Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Princesses don't give blow jobs
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
