chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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