it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
