I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
So much Jack, so little girl.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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