I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
