PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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