Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
