physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
