i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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