I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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