2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
