AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
