is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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