i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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