You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize