You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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