wanna go halves on a baby?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Randomize
