i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
