Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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