I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize