Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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