Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i think i have two assholes
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
