that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
You were trust falling into bushes
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
