I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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