There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
don't judge my taste in strippers
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
