if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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