she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
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