Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize