something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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