Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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