Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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