too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Bring me that man meat
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
