So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
