my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
