lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I looked at my own cervix.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
