he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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